All through the holidays I had been waiting to get my period so that we could start our fertility testing. I was anxious to get things started but at the same time I kept telling myself to enjoy this quiet time. I knew that once the testing started it might get stressful. The morning that I went to get my cycle day 3 testing was a freezing cold morning. I got up a little earlier than I had to so I had enough time to do my hair and put some make up on. I figured it wouldn't hurt to not look like a zombie. I had to get to the clinic by 7:45AM and I had no idea what to expect. When I got there the waiting room was filled with women and men sitting in silence. It was more intense than I had expected. I took the closest seat to the door and sat down.
When the nurse saw me fifteen minutes later she started to pull the vials out of the bins. I watched her out of the corner of my eye and saw that she lined up tube after tube. I finally said, "Are those all for me?" The nurse tried to reassure me by telling me that if I was donating blood she'd be taking 50 vials of blood instead of the 11 she had. Luckily the nurse found a good vein so I was done pretty quickly.
On the drive home I stopped to pick up breakfast for us and I was coming around the bend a block away from our house, I saw the sun peaking above the horizon. A beautiful start to the day.
My doctor advised that I lose weight to increase my chances of getting pregnant and you better believe that I've been going to the gym and have been trying to eat healthy foods. For dinner one night I made clam stuffed mushrooms with kale on the side. Lunch another day was salad with feta, pumpkin seeds and peppers. It feels good to take care of myself.
My motto recently has been to treat myself lovingly. I've been taking time to do all of the things that bring me joy. I know that this process can be incredibly draining and it's easy to get yourself into a dark hole. I've been making time to read, write in my journal, spend time with my husband and do yoga. I've treated myself to coffee a few days this week (skinny vanilla lattes are my crack). I had a gift card left over from Christmas and decided to treat myself on my day off. I bought myself a patterned infinity scarf, a neon orange zipup for the gym, sparkle flats and a new candle. All of these things lift my spirits.
Coming up-- my HSG dye test.
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